Dave Ford Does Earth

Posted by Dave Ford

The Internet in Patagonia blows the big one. Now, I realize that there is nothing down here. I realize that it is a beautiful place, full of glaciers, and penguins, and sheep farmers. However, there is no reason that I should not be able to send an email in 5 minutes. As far as computers go, Patagonia –both Argentinian and Chilean- are hopelessly trapped in 1996.

The 32 hour bus ride from Bariloche was not much better than Internet connections in Patagonia. I have come to the conclusion that I am simply too large for bus transportation. In addition, I am too large for planes, the back seats of most cars, and bicycles. My most recent addition to the list is horses.

Anyway, enough bitching.  On with the good stuff. I saw a Glacier!

Perito Moreno Glacier is one of the natural wonders of the world–so I have heard, this could be a huge lie.  For my last day with the Aussie boys we went to the Glacier via El Calafate, a small town that only exists due to glacier tourism. Since Bariloche we have been hanging out with a English Tom and he joined us on the day trip.

The glacier is a massive display of the wonders of nature. In person, it was breathtaking.

Quick facts according to Jorge(whore-hey) our tour guide:

1. Glacier Perito Moreno is in the small percentage of the worlds glaciers that are actually growing. 90 percent of the worlds Glaciers are shrinking due to global warmin.
2. A Glacier is actually compacted snow, not ice.

3. The Glacier we saw is a remnant of the last Ice Age.

4. He also attempted to make an analogy involving chocolate cake and cream. The mountains were the top of the chocolate cake, while the glacier was the cream. I will spare you the details, but,  Jorge did not make a damn bit of sense.

The highlight of the day was when a huge portion of the front of the glacial wall fell off into the water. It sounded like thunder and caused a 4 foot wave. On the observation deck, you could hear a consistent cracking and popping coming from the Glacier at all times.

Ben and Billy took off for Ushuaia last night. They have to catch a flight for Brazil in a few days. The three of us all started traveling on January 9th. So, we went out to a one month anniversary dinner to celebrate after seeing the glacier. We enjoyed a nice steak, tasty red wine, and the BV show made out with a slightly unattractive Israeli girl. On this note, we said our goodbyes and parted ways. I wished the boys the best of luck. We had talks about reunited after the trip in Baltimore and Sydney.

In Chile

I am in Puerto Natales in Chile. Just like El Calafate, this town exists solely due to tourism to Parque National Torres Del Paine. Torres Del Paine is the number one tourist attraction in Chilean Patagonia and is supposed to be jaw dropping. Tomorrow, I am embarking on a four day backpacking trip into the park. Pending Internet service, I should be able to post again sometime next weekend.

Sidenote: I have only been backpacking in the woods once. Two notable things happened.

1. I saw a Bear
2. I was almost arrested by a Park Ranger

Chilean Punch Out

Walking up the street today in Puerto Natales I saw two guys about 45 years old get into a good old fashioned fist fight. I thought they were playing around at first, when the big guy started pounding the little guy in the face. It was a total scene that involved screaming women and children by the end. I have no idea what happened but it was entertaining.

Currency Woes 

Argentine currency is pretty easy to get your head around. One US dollar = 3 Argentine Pesos. Now I am in Chile where 1 US dollar = 554 Chilean Pesos.

Could someone please send me a calculator so I can buy a can of Coke?

Here’s the real kicker, it is more expensive in Chile than in Argentina. My head is beginning to hurt again just thinking about it.

Notes:

> To answer everyone’s number one question: Yes, I appear to be getting fat. The individuals that told me that I would lose weight while traveling will eventually feel my wrath. That is you John Wynn and company.  As of now, I think I am going to attempt to alter my daily intake of of empanadas, steak, french fries, more steak, cheese, and candy bars to something a bit more moderate and balanced. I will walk close to 30 miles in the next four days. I am going to look for a picture of fat Dave and compare it to skinny Dave after my walk in the woods.

> I have learned from my friend Josh that his 7 year old daughter Madeline´s class is now following the blog. I am not sure what the official policy in Anne Arundel County Public schools is on naked Australians, but,  I am feeling a little better about not posting the infamous Bariloche pictures.

> Patagonia is slammed with Israeli travelers. I am not sure why, but I am going to figure it out.

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