Dave Ford Does Earth

Posted by Dave Ford

Historic Cartegena

For many travelers, the end of extended world trip can be difficult. You start to thing about going back home. You wonder how your friends and family are doing, and really start to miss them. I would not say that “homesickness” is the right word to describe the feeling. I think for me more than anything I would call it travelers fatigue.

This low energy, semi depressed feeling hit me in the airport in Cuba (in which I sat for 8 hours with no money to buy anything to eat or drink) and carried through my first couple days in Cartegena, which were spent alone and in sweltering heat mixed with oppressive humidity.

I was also originally expecting to arrive to Cartegena and meet up with Dave and Ben, who had to take off quicker than usual due to financial constraints.

And then, just at a point when I even started to have thoughts about going home early, THEY CAME!

Jess and Lisa to SAVE THE DAY!

==========================================================

I traveled with Jess in La Paz, Cusco, and Rurrenbaque for a total of about three weeks over my travels. In addition, I met Lisa in Cusco and spent about a week and half with her in La Paz my last time through. These chicks are cool and so much fun.

My girls showed up late at night a few days ago in Cartegena. I even felt compelled to pick them up at the Airport. Just seeing them took my energy levels through the roof and sent the travel fatigue packing. Luckily, I saved most of the touristy stuff in Cartegena for the arrival of the chicas and we HIT IT UP HARD over the course of the next few days.
………………………………………

The History of Cartegena

Cartegena is the seaside city that the Spaniards decided to store all of the gold and treasures that they pillaged from the Incas and other native tribes. All of this went down in the 1500’s through the 1800’s when Bolivar and San Martin liberated almost all of South America.

Therefore, the city was under almost constant siege for almost 300 years by the real life “Pirates of the Caribbean”. Over the course of this extended time period the Spanish built huge walls that surrounded the entire walled city. Today the colonial period is remarkably preserved inside these walls built so many years ago.

The girls and I on top of the fort overlooking the old and new cities.

On top of the walls looking out at the Caribbean Sea.

Cartegena is hands down one of the most beautiful cities that I have visited in South America. The vibe reminds me a great deal of Salvador in Brazil. The Afro-Colombian presence is everywhere. Around every corner the locals are constantly trying to get you to buy their goods. Furthermore, at least in late July, the heat is stifling.

The Balconies inside the walled city all look something like this.

Sidenote: Colombian women have been rumored to be the most beautiful in the entire world. At least from my perspective, I am going to go ahead and confirm this.

Lisa inside the walled city…

=======================

This Fort was built a long time ago and I cannot remember what it was called. Damn it!

Over the course of the next few days Jess, Lisa, and I did as much as we could in Cartegena. We toured the fort built by the Spanish back in the day, we went to the beach, and we drank a lot of cervezas and mojitos inside the walled city.

Jess wandering in Cartegena

Sidenote: I also spent some time shopping with the girls. I was then reminded just how much I hate everything there is to do with shopping. Any girl that I have ever dated in the past can can confirm my utter hatred for it. Nonetheless, overall I was a pretty good sport. Well, at least I think I was a good sport about it. I tried to negotiate dressing room privileges with the girls in exchange for my shopping compliance but was promptly denied.

We spent a lot of time strolling through the city streets at an extremely slow pace (Lisa messed up her ankle and it is NO BUENO). There are little parks everywhere. You can also get on top of the walls and gaze out both at the Caribbean Sea and the historic city at the same time. Did I mention how beautiful this city was?

In my hostel I met up with my English buddy Ammo (we met up in Cusco and LIma) and another two English guys (Cullum and Andy). The 6 of us decided that we were going to go out for a big one in Cartegena. This would end up being my first really big night in over three weeks. So, it was highly built up and anticipated.

We ended up having a blast in a few different bars and clubs. Ammo ended up getting completely hammered. He was hysterical. Normally when people get as drunk as he got they end up being a burden on the rest of the group. However, Ammo was completely the opposite. He had this ridiculous smile on his face for the entire second half of the night in which he was practically falling over. Also, the shit coming out of his mouth was hysterical.

When we were walking the girls back to their hotel at the end of the night he was probably 20 paces behind us. Out of nowhere, he stopped and screamed “BAXTER, YOU’RE LIKE A MINIATURE BUDDHA COVERED IN HAIR”! (Anchorman reference if you have not seen it). He also completely rolled out of the top bunk in our dorm room. I entered the room to see him flat out on his back, radiating that same ridiculous grin. He woke up the other 6 people that were sleeping. There was nothing anyone could do but laugh.

The next day, he did not remember a single thing. BRILLIANT!

—————————————————————————————————–

So, Jess and Lisa have this thing with themes. They came to Cartegena after spending two straight weeks on the beaches of Mancora, in Northern Peru (I was there for 3 days). According to legend, the two of them and my good friend Billy (traveled for months everywhere with him) would have pirate parties. From what I gather they semi dressed up like pirates, drank a lot of rum, and finished every sentence with ARRRRRR!

Rolling Cartagena Style…Jess, Lisa, Ammo, and Me in my White Linen Pants

Seemingly the pirate theme would have worked beautifully in a city that was constantly under siege by “pirates”. However, I think it died in Mancora. Somewhere, someplace, he girls decided that we were going to go out old man Colombian style. This would require panama hats for everyone, scotch, Cuban cigars, and me wearing white linen pants. I am not exactly sure how everything was decided. I just went with the flow.

I mistaken for an Israeli a few times while in this getup. Lots of Shaloms were thrust upon me.

Sidenote: Do not worry the white linen pants will appear again upon my triumphant return to the United States. I look good in white linen pants. Really good!

I ended up staying in Cartegena for almost a week. Once the chicas arrived, the weather improved quite a bit. We got one great day in at the beach. It was great except that when I was in the water a giant piece of poop floated right by me. I do not want to get mad, and do not want to get up on a soapbox or anything. However, YOU SIMPLY DO NOT POOP IN THE OCEAN! Peeing is fine. Everyone pees in the ocean. Pooping.. is not fine. Ok, I am glad I got that off of my chest. If someone could translate this last message to Spanish and fax it to the Colombian Department of Tourism it would be much appreciated.

Anyways, after a few great days in Cartegena, we hopped a bus and got out of town. Time is getting short and there is way too much to see in Caribbean, Colombia. I do not think I am going to be able to get everything in that I want to do. Damn it! I guess I can not complain. Its been an amazing 7 months and it has to end sometime. Right?

Cafe del Mar. Its a club on top of an outpost of the walls.. Amazing, but expensive..

———————————————————-

Notes:

> With only a couple of weeks left, I am on a semi tight schedule to see the rest of Caribbean Colombia. Currently, we are staying at the tiny fishing village of Taganga. We have been beaching it up there, chilling quite a bit, and getting Scuba certified. From there it looks like Jess and I will be doing the 6 day Lost City Trek through the jungle. This is in guerrilla country. Wish me luck!

> I am starting to semi prepare myself for re-entry shock. I fly into Miami on the 13th of August to hang out with my buddy Dave Binck. I wrote about him a few months back. He was working in a hotel and was jumped by a bunch of thugs while they were robbing the hotel. They hit him in the head with a bat a bunch of times. Really NO BUENO. At one point, they were not sure he was going to make it. Well, thank God everything worked out and he is fine. Nonetheless, I was shaken up by the whole experience and have been thinking about all he has been through throughout my travels. I really want to get a chance to hang out with him. Also, most flights into and out of South America go through Miami so it works out perfectly. From there its back to Baltimore. I think I might be driving. This should be interesting as I have not driven a car in 7 months. I am really getting excited to see everyone.

Note to everyone from back home: Put your drinking shoes on! Its going to be a festive couple of weeks. I am declaring a state of holiday for all that know me that will not end until September 1st!

>Colombia has an abundance of amazing fruits. There are two or three that I have never heard of. So, freshly blended juice is huge. I love juice. When I say I love Juice, I mean to say that I really, really, really love juice. I had four huge glasses yesterday. You feel so healthy. Its amazing. However, right after that we all got a coke, some cheese poofs, potato chips, and a snickers bar. Hopefully its all balancing out in the end.

> Lisa is back on the job as my proofreader. So, if you run across any spelling or grammar errors its all her fault.

> Unfortunately, I have had to completely scrap Bogota and Medellin on this trip. I simply do not have enough time. It is disappointing. However, I still have enough sights to see in South America to keep me occupied for another full year down here. It is such a big place. Colombia alone is huge.

> So, I cannot save this story for the next post. I need to get it off my chest ASAP. As I was saying, we are in this really small fishing village called Taganga. The roads are not paved and the only internet cafe is terrible. Its very quiet, yet beautiful and so relaxing. You buy fish from the fisherman as they come in after the days catch. Anyway, we are staying in a pretty decent place. The only problem stems from this ridiculous Rooster that is somewhere in the proximity of our hostel. This thing is driving me Fing crazy. It crows at all the wrong times. Now listen, I do not know a whole lot about roosters. But, I do know that they are supposed to crow at dawn. That is their job. They wake everyone up. Its as simple as that. This stupid thing crows all the time. 10 o clock at night, 3 o clock in the morning, 4 in the afternoon. And its not like it just crows once, it has a deeply powerful voice (think James Earl Jones in rooster form), and goes on for 15 or 20 minutes at a time. Just when you think he is done, he goes on for another 10 minutes. I HATE this stupid, idiotic rooster! I vowed today to the girls that I will catch it and kill it with my bare hands. Since my heated rage subsided, I have decided that I will find the rooster, then find its owner, and then buy it. From there I will pay someone else to kill it ( I might watch it die, I have not decided yet). After that I think we will all have a delicious chicken and rice dinner. If I can manage to pull this off, the smile on my face will not leave me for the duration of my journey. This much I promise.

We ate at this chicken joint in Cartegena. I do not know why but I found it extremely amusing. Broasted? I want me some broasted rooster.

> This might not be the cleanest post ever as I am in a huge rush to make it happen. We need to get back to our little fishing village ASAP to have dinner with Marco our dive instructor… We also have to watch a two hour video that should put us all to sleep. Plus, Lisa was supposed to reproofread but she has vanished.

Share This